The Lamb or the Eagle

July 4^th rolled around this last year and for the first time in my life, it meant nothing to me. Over the span of my life time, I have celebrated Independence Day in two different countries and for most of my adult life been away from my family on this American holiday. This year was different. My wife and I celebrated by spending time together like we do on July 3^rd and July 5^th. It was basically like any other day. It was really weird for me. I had this feeling that something wasn't right. I thought that maybe it was because I was tired or sick or something. I wondered if maybe it was because politics were getting so ridiculous.

They say ignorance is bliss. When President Bush was elected, I was jubilant to say the least. Having Bush as my president caused a deep seated patriotic spirit to rise up within me. He would be the man to lead America into prosperity and America would be like it use to be when our grandfather's had a love of country. So when I think about the passion I had for America back then and compare my attitude to now, I am pretty sure that my old self would want to beat up my new self. I imagine this conversation.

Old Noah: Hey who are you going to vote for in this election?

Noah: Not sure.

ON: What!?!?! How can you not know!?!? I thought you were a Christian?!?!

Noah: I didn't know Jesus was running for office.

ON: You are an idiot!

My bedroom in high school looked like the Republican Party headquarters threw up all over it. Hugh American flag along with political signs were situated on every wall. The irony was that I had this small wooden sign that hung over my bed that said, "God always keeps his promises". My trust and hope, however, rested more on which political party was in control. I trusted in the chariots of American idealism over and against God.

So what happened? Well, I guess I found out that eight years of a Christian president didn't lead America to a higher morality or lead America to become more Christian. The reality though is based more off the fact that I began to examine my heart and my life.

Socrates once said, "The unexamined life is not worth living." So, in a sense I feel that I am better off. However, the pride that I once had for being an AMERICAN Christian fell away. I realized that embodying the Gospel may in fact fly in the face of American pride. TO be sure, America preaches a gospel, but the gospel of America is a golden calf that is hollow. It is the gospel that tells us that in order to be happy, we are to buy and consume. The American gospel's saints are equipped with guns who are instructed by the American messiah to go forth and kill the enemy. And the church has lost her sight and is being led to the fire by her lover the State.

I began to realize that if I truly wanted to live out the Gospel that I would love my enemies. I realized that humility, not pride, was to be lived out in my heart and life. In a sense, it became impossible for me to hold the weight of the flag and the weight of the cross. I was forced to lay down the flag. In that action though, I discovered that the burden of the cross was lighter than the yoke of the State.

 

 

Greedy Little Pig

This morning I woke up and went to make a sandwich for lunch. When I grabbed the bread for the sandwich I discovered that the bread was moldy. No big deal, just throw it away. When I went to pull out the lunchmeat and mayo I saw at the bottom drawers of the refrigerator apples and lettuce that were bought several weeks ago that were starting to rot.

One of my good friends, Scott Childress, posted a great blog about his journey after understanding the Gospel and discovering the conviction of consumerism. It has been an interesting year. After engaging in many conversations with my friends, reading books, and watching movies I have felt a deep conviction over the American dream of buying and consuming.

I am six months into my protest from buying new clothes. This last June, I felt a stirring in my soul to go on a strike from buying new clothes for at least a year. After going through my closet, I discovered (And am still discovering) clothes that have tags on them or else have been worn once or twice. The question in my mind arises, "How many pairs of jeans do I need?" or "How many shoes can you wear at one time?"

I confess, I have come very close to buying new clothes several times in the last six months. It is amazing how many sales and great deals I have found since June. I also confess that I have not felt anything at this point that would lead me to feeling free or feeling…anything really. I have been comfortable and haven't felt shame for the clothes I am wearing. They are all really nice clothes that are relatively in good shape.

One thing is for sure though when journeying on the path of Christ, is that as you begin to understand more of the Gospel that is when it changes again and goes deeper. This morning I have discovered this. I feel a conviction for buying groceries and letting them rot. More than buying junk food and more than buying organic; I am beginning to be convicted about waste. I am ashamed that I have bought food that sits in a pantry and rots.

Perhaps the hording of food and clothes is an attitude that is deeply rooted in the disbelief of God to provide for my needs. It disgusts me how far removed I am from my global neighbors who don't have shoes and go without food for days on end while I stockpile more food and more clothes. How can I say that I care about people and I love them when I think so selfishly?

I am concerned as we head into another holiday season that I will forget completely about God. To be sure, songs, prayers, and Scripture readings will all be present; but will Jesus? I tend to think that he won't be as close to me as I stuff my face full of turkey and unwrap presents as I sit cozy in a warm house. He probably will draw close to those who are hungry, cold, and alone for the holidays.