Discouragement

I have felt pretty discouraged in the last couple of days. The crazy thing is that I can't exactly pinpoint it. I think to be really honest it is multilayered and there is not one specific thing that I can point to for the source. So I decided to write this blog hoping that it would release some of my feelings.

Working in a job where you are essentially a salesmen can be exhilarating on some days and terrible on others. Most of the time, when I hear the words "No thanks" I am able to handle it and brush it off. I think though that when you hear those words enough you become weary and start to think that it is you. At least, so is the case with me. I feel like I am either useless or not doing my job. It becomes very personal and depressing. As if working in a cubical wasn't depressing on its own. Finding the strength to push forward in the face of "No" however is what distinguishes an adult from a child. In these moments I know that I must hope…

I find a great source of discouragement from George Bush. I don't know if there really is a worse president than him. I think that I am especially discouraged in the fact that I was partly responsible for him being in the white house…twice. The good news is that he is almost done; the bad news is that I fear for McCain being our next president. I know that I shouldn't take too much stock in American government or think that is what God will use to bring His kingdom on earth. But I can't help to think that if we had a better president than we may be able to have better relations with people outside the U.S. or that we might be able to stop this war. It really bothers me some days.

There are so many people that tick me off it is unreal. I mean, from the guy who is crossing the street in front of my car to the coworker who continually acts like she is better than me. People are obnoxious and stupid. How could I ever find anything hopeful or good about another human being?

I am frustrated by my own lack of action in regards to my convictions. There are things that I know to be right and instead of taking action and doing something about it, I sit and do nothing. Where is the love of God towards to poor in my own heart? Where do I serve those around me? Convenience is a dirty word and is a great excuse for laziness.

Emily the other day pulled a David to my Goliath of frustration by saying, "Just think one day this will all be restored in God's kingdom". Ouch! Why does she have to be right sometimes? I am losing sight of hope and as such I need prayer to renew my strength. I am weak and need the Gospel to restore me and bring me newness of life. It is weird how my theology teaches me that God has/will bring all things to restoration, but I lack the understanding to seek it in my personal life. Work is not my center, nor George Bush, nor stupid people. They are counterfeit and the second I allow this to happen is the second I will be met with discouragement. My head knows this, but I must make strides to believe it.

Radiohead insight

What is this video about?

A Word about War part III

I surf YouTube a lot. I really enjoy seeing some of my favorite authors, speakers, musicians, etc. I could essentially spend hours on that website. Yesterday I had some time to watch a clip and wanted to see if there were any new clips featuring Tony Campolo. I plugged in the name in the search engine and one of the first clips that came up was John McArthur. I should have known better but my curiosity was peeked.

John McArthur has classically been known for his outrageous statements, but I found it most interesting when he criticized Tony Campolo for making the statement that, "…Jesus central message was the kingdom of God and bringing that 'to earth as in heaven'". McArthur said that the problem with people like Campolo, Mclaren, etc is that they are classic liberals who seek to make the Gospel social when in reality it is, "…about rescuing people from a literal hell and getting people to heaven."

I sat there and wondered if Jesus would have said the same thing. Please understand that I don't hate McArthur or think that anything he said was new. I have heard this same message preached from many pulpits. I find it interesting that God is not concerned with poverty or social justice when God's economy is set up in such a way that the "Meek shall inherit the earth". I fear that this attitude leads to countless believers thinking that Christ message was divorced from context in socio-economic meaning. In this way, Christ message has been minimalized into an individualistic compartmentalized consumeristic acceptance. The call and conviction of the believer has nothing to do with caring for the poor in their economic status, but only for their soul and getting them to heaven. St. James is very clear and explicit on this issue.

I was a little disturbed this morning when I turned on my computer to find Senator John McCain plastered on AOL News saying that we should keep sending cigarettes to Iran because that is a way of killing them off. That was not what disturbed me because it is classic McCain. AOL News typically has a survey that they ask you regarding the news headline. The Question was "Do you think that John McCain's joke was inappropriate?" 53% of people said no and 63% said they trust him on foreign policy.

My heart aches as I hear that people are so filled with hate that to joke about killing ones' neighbors isn't marked as inappropriate. The idea that the Gospel has nothing to say about this type of behavior is ludicrous. If the Gospel is truly the good news, I am not sure that this good news would be good to those who suffer and are only told that God cares for your soul and not your stomach. I am also not sure that the Gospel would be good news if those who are to enact Christ are crying out for vengeance and war.